The one where I'm humbled.

So this morning I woke up to get ready for church. I looked outside and saw the several new inches of fresh, heavy snow. My shoulders fell a little and I just wanted to get back into my warm bed. The thought of getting my five little ones ready and out the door by 8:55 a.m. was daunting.

I was having an unusually bad hair day. I didn't love my outfit. Olivia didn't like how I did her hair and Ethan didn't like my breakfast choice of cold cereal. Lindsay couldn't find her other dress boot and Tyson would not let Makenna get him dressed. I was frustrated and half thought to myself...would anyone even notice if we just stayed home?

Anyway, we got it all together and managed to get to our bench with a few minutes to spare. (even though I got snow in my shoe and now my toes were cold.)

As I sat there trying to keep the kids noise level at a dull roar, I heard a plunk and then a dragging noise. Again, and then again. I turned around to see a beautiful woman with silver hair pushing her walker down the aisle. She wore a pretty red coat and comfy shoes over her nude colored hosiery. She was assisted by another white haired beauty and came to sit in the row in front of us. I found out that these ladies were the speaker's mother and grandmother.

She was 96 years old.

As I sat behind her and looked at her newly curled hair and noticed her wrinkled hands, I wondered what efforts she had put forth to get ready for this special day. She had to drive in that horrible snow and then get from the car to the building using a walker.

I was instantly overcome with gratitude for the opportunity I had to be there at church to worship the Savior and feel of the spirit. My hair didn't seem as bad and I didn't feel quite as frumpy as I had before. I thought of all the people in the world who walk for miles to get to church. People who go to church alone without any family. People who don't even know about Jesus Christ. I was sufficiently humbled and I'm so grateful for the sweet little stranger who strengthened my testimony simply by making the decision to get out of her warm bed.

I'm a voter, he's a voter, wouldn't ya like to be a voter too

So I was pretty excited to go vote this year.
I tried to go early in the day before people got off work so I wouldn't have to wait in line.
Well, if you know me, you know that I was there at 5:15...standing in line.
As I stood there in the line watching people vote, I couldn't help but get a smidge emotional.
I know, that's silly.
But I just couldn't help it.
It all started with the little old man leaning on his cane while he voted. His hands were so shaky that he may have inadvertantly voted for the other guy. But he was there...voting.
I got looking around at the people that had taken the time to come and let their voice be heard.
If I were brave (which I am not)
I would have taken out my camera and snapped a shot (which I didn't).
But if I had, it would have looked something like this.
The skinny kid with big glasses who I'm sure was casting his first vote ever stood behind a guy in a suit and really expensive shoes.
Another guy with skin like leather walked past on his way to leave. With every step he took, a small billow of dust or concrete mix or something puffed out of his work boots.
A young mother rummaged through her purse looking for something to shush her bored toddler.
A not so young mother right behind her freely dispensed with unsolicited advice.
A woman in fancy clothes stood next to a lady in sweats as they picked the candidates they thought would do the best job...I wondered if they were the same candidates?
And finally, the man standing in front of me wore a work shirt with his name on it.
He smelled like motor oil.
The woman behind me wore a lovely sweater vest and smelled like butterscotch cookies.
Such different people all doing the same thing.
Different incomes, different jobs, different houses, different beliefs.
But there we were. Standing in line.
How lucky are we to pick our leaders?
Sure, they may not be perfect and sometimes they're just downright stupid...but we get to pick em'.
No socialist dictator or ruling monarchy chooses. We do. It's downright cool actually.
I hear people whine all the time about the state of things and then find out they didn't vote.
Whatever. I mean, come on! A lot of people fought and died so we could.
I was just really proud of my little group of fellow voters. Especially the guy I saw walk in with a cast on his leg.
Anyhoo, I'm glad I got to vote. Thanks mom for making me a sentimental, patriotic sap.
God Bless America. Stars and Stripes forever and Don't Tread on Me. For the People and all those other ones.

p.s. Who was the guy that thought up the donkey and the elephant? It couldn't have been something a little cooler? A Jaguar and a Lion or... something?

oh, and p.s.s. Lady behind me that smelled like butterscotch, if you're blogging about standing in line behind me, will you please say that I smelled like Tahitian coconuts? Thank you.

Anticipation

So my sweet 9 year old Makenna found an old roll of film in a box the other day.
She held it up and with the utmost sincerity asked, "Mom, what the heck is this?"
I tried to explain it and then finally just went and got the memory card out of the digital camera and she knew what I was talking about.

Uhm....holy cow!!

I remember my first camera. I was maybe 14 and I got it for Christmas. I felt very grown up.
I recall learning carefully how to load the film into the camera. I also learned (by mistake) that you must not open the camera until the entire roll of film has been used. I took my little camera with me everywhere. But I only took it out for special occasions because you know, it only had 24 exposures. (sometimes you even squeezed 25 out of it.) It usually took me about a month to fill up the roll. (I didn't want to waste any of those precious exposures on just anyone or anything). Sometimes it would be so long that I would actually forget what was at the beginning of the roll.
Anyhoo, then you would take the roll of film to the store where you would fill out an envelope with your info on it. You would carefully slide the film into the envelope, seal it up and put it in the slot. Then you would wait 7 days while it was sent out to be developed at some other location. Finally, you would pedal on up to the store to retreive your photos. You'd hand over your hard earned baby-sitting cash and then you would start to undo the package even before you were out of the store. You would eagarly flip through the glossy prints only to be dissapointed that the picture you sneakily took of that cute boy you liked was out of focus. Oh man, the one of you and your best friends at Lagoon has half of your heads cut off. And that one where your hair was really cute that day and you looked super skinny?......yep, your eyes were closed.
And then there was that blasted red eye. Future generations will probably come to the conclusion that most people who lived during the last half of the 20th century were possessed by demons and surrounded by some hazy darkness.
And then, if you had to make a copy of a picture...yeah, you had to search through all of the negatives until you found it and then had to go and repeat the process all over again...and pay for it again.
Enter the Digital camera.
My four year old not only knows how to take a picture, he can look at it instantly and edit. He decides right then and there if he should delete it. He can tell if Daddy was looking off instead of at the camera. He knows immediately if Lindsay's eyes are closed. He can ask Olivia to smile instead of make a goofy face. He can take as many shots of the same pose as he wants. He is armed with a memory card. And then you take it to your computer, download, edit, enlarge, and print. You can even send a copy off to Grandma. It's relatively instant.
"Oh, you have to have an 'I am Special' poster?....tomorrow morning? No sweat. Let's head to the office and print off your life in 5 minutes."
No waiting.
But also no anticipation.

I vividly remember waiting in line for 20 minutes to buy tickets to Jurassic Park. Then we waited another hour and a half in line before it even started so we didn't end up on the front row with a headache and vertigo.
Now you can buy your movie tickets in your pajamas, 3 weeks before it even comes out. You show up 2 minutes before it starts and find your seat. It's convenient with 5 kids that's for sure.
We can order something and have it shipped to our home OVERNIGHT.
That's like...mind-boggling when you really think about it. Things used to take weeks or months.
It's all very convenient and fast and gives us more time to hurry up and quickly do other things.
The last time I was getting my oil changed, (at Wal-Mart...don't tell Greg.) the guy in front of me was like freaking out that it was going to take them 20 minutes to change the oil in his car.
"I can't believe it takes that long." And he threw himself into a chair and pulled out his phone and laptop and spent his time in the virtual world.
I sat in my chair and watched a little 70ish year old couple wander aimlessly around the windshield wipers and floor mats and giggled at the mental picture of Greg and I shopping for car accessories in 40 years.
I flipped through a golf magazine and hoped that Ethan or Tyson would grow up to be a professional golfer. (Lots of money, low risk of injury...good choice). I watched Tyson study two ants crawl around on the floor, (I know, gross). He was fascinated.
Now I'm not implying that my time was spent more wisely than the other guy's. I like my electronic life as much as anyone. I just enjoyed my stay at Wal-Lube a little more I think.
So my question is this.
Are we losing the joy of anticipation? The excitement of waiting for something. The appreciation that comes after receiving. The simple virtue of patience.
Is it so wrong to slow down and just....*gasp* wait?
I guess it's a good thing we still have Christmas and the first day of school right?
Oh, and the Tooth Fairy...she's always good for some excitement.
(when she shows up. We have a crappy Tooth Fairy.
She has severe memory loss, she's totally inconsistent and she's kind of a cheapskate.)

Uhm....seriously?

Man sells pot to pay for police academy
August 24th, 2010 @ 10:40am
By Randall Jeppesen
OREM -- A man who says he was just trying to save up the money for the police academy is now looking at the other side of the justice system because of what he's accused of doing to get the cash.
According to the Daily Herald, police got a search warrant to check up on the activities of Marcos Antonio Ramirez of Orem after reports surfaced he had been selling drugs. Officers found he had marijuana, a scale, a stolen gun and drug paraphernalia.
Ramirez admitted to knowing the gun was stolen and that he was selling the drugs, but the reason he gave was a little unique.
The Daily Herald reports Ramirez told officers he had been selling pot for five months to pay for the police academy.
Police arrested Ramirez on suspicion of possession with intent to distribute, possession of a stolen firearm, possession of drug paraphernalia and possession of a controlled substance.
E-mail: rjeppesen@ksl.com

This makes perfect sense right?
You know, like the woman who became a prostitute to pay for her wedding
or the guy that sold child pornography to pay for his elementary education degree.

Satan makes it so easy for us humans to rationalize decisions.
I don't think anyone wakes up in the morning and says, "I think I'll make a really bad life choice today that will effect not only me but those around me."
Satan is much more subtle than that.
He's crafty. (and not in the glue-gun, decoupage kind of way)
He makes things that are bad look not so bad (that movie was great except for a couple of parts)
He makes things that are good look nerdy or old fashioned.
He's a stinker.
We all make small everyday decisions that effect our entire lives.
My parents used to be voluntary clergy out at the prison. I remember the stories they would tell of the men and women they worked with.
Most of them would not be experiencing those heartbreaks if they had only made a few small choices a little differently. "If I hadn't listened to that friend", "if I hadn't gotten into his car", "if only I had not gone to that place"...
little choices.

One of my greatest worries is that my children will make one or two bad choices that will lead to a future heartbreak. That they will be influenced and let other people make choices for them. That I will have failed as a mother.
This is fear. This is Satan. This is trickery.
One of my greatest expectactions is that my children will remember what they have been taught. That they will have the confindence to stand up for what they know is right. That they will be leaders and will influence others to make good choices.
This is faith. This is a loving God. This is hope.

I know that my children will make mistakes and bad choices. We all do. It's part of the learning process. I only hope that they will learn from those mistakes, that they will recognize the tricks of Satan and that they will embrace the power of Jesus Christ.
And above all, that they will never think that it's okay to sell drugs to become a cop.

Here's to faith, hope and some really good rules.

(I do love them so)

You're acting like a child!

So if you've ever been to Chuck-E-Cheese's you are painfully aware of:

a. the absurd amount of germs surrounding your children

b. the disturbing lack of parenting that goes on there

c. the "ride" that takes a high quality photo of your munchkin.

My kids love this little attraction and usually end up spending most of their tokens on these photo keepsakes. Last time we were there, I had a pile of pictures, as usual. Makenna came up and handed me another for the stack.

You may be wondering who the cute little girl next to her is.

I was too. Makenna said, "I think her name is Amber. We're friends now".

Simple as that.

Kids just say, "Hi. Want to play?" They don't need any background information. A first name will suffice. They don't care where you live, if you have a cool bike or what you got on your last spelling test. They just want to play. And if the other kid says no, they just shrug their shoulders and move on to the next kid. They are best friends...until mom says it's time to go.

Adults are a little more guarded. We consider things like what kind of car you drive, how much money you make and what your pant size is. We take friendships slowly and carefully. We have expectations and rules. And if a friendship goes awry, we get hurt or offended.

When does this change take place? When do those walls come up? And why do we let them?

When does the basic human need for bonding turn into judgment and fear?

Is it because we're shy or uncomfortable going outside of our comfort zone? Or maybe we're just so busy trying to get to the next thing, the thought doesn't even occur to us.

Whatever the reason, I say we all start acting like children again. They have the ability to look outside of themselves and see the good in someone else. Let's pretend that the waiting area at Jiffy Lube is Chuck-E-Cheese's (same amount of grime right?). Or that neighbor you've never talked to is that girl waiting for a partner on the see-saw. Just do it, I dare ya.

It happened to me recently at soccer practice. I was trying to keep an eye on 3 kids on the playground, one on the soccer field and one in desperate need of a snack. While I was rummaging through the suitcase that is my purse, I heard a pretty voice from behind me say..."Hello."

I turned around to see the matching pretty face (and gorgeous hair, perfect teeth and teensy waist) smiling at me. I said hello back and we started easily chatting about soccer, kids and life in general. After the 5 or so minutes that we talked it was clear that we had many things in common and it felt like we were old friends. Suzette was kind and genuine and I think I was as well. We smiled and said, "See ya next week".

Imagine if she hadn't said anything or if I had not responded. Instead, we are able to chat at soccer games and greet each other as friends at school functions. I am happy to say that I know and admire her and her beautiful family. And ya know that I'm gonna like her cause she named her son after a baseball player.

Recently at the first grade awards assembly, we sat by each other as we watched our two six year olds receive the award for...you'll never guess...being friendly to others

**

while our two four year old boys played with each other like they've been friends forever.

So I felt the need to snap a picture of the radiant Suzette and the thrown together Mindy.

If only it had that nice Chuck-E-Cheese's border around it.

Just goes to show ya...being childlike isn't bad. So yeah, I know we're all in a hurry but next time you see that cashier at the store who never judges you for getting Ho Ho's every single time, give her an extra bit of conversation. (Unless it's the one at Costco who asks me every stinkin' time if they're all mine). And maybe the receptionist at the dentist's office would like to hear about something other than your bi-cuspids. Or leave a comment on the blog of someone you don't know but love to read. (I'm getting better at this, I just feel so stalkery).

Or maybe just a simple hello to someone you don't know cause...ya never know...

This picture:

could end up in their wedding video. :)

Here's to being friendly.

**remember me mocking the high quality photos at Chuck-E-Cheese's....yeah sorry.

Malls and Murses.

So we took Makenna to the mall to get her ears pierced. She was pretty excited but a little nervous. The girl shows us the earrings we can chose from. They range in price from $14.99 to $125.99. Of course, she picks the $125.00 diamonds. She has good taste. I suggested the $14.99 silver balls. After about 10 minutes of haggling and filling out the "if you die, it's not our fault" form we finally agree on the silver balls and we tell the sales girl our choice. The teenage manager then informs me that they don't allow children to get anything less than the $33.99 pair. "Oh really?" I ask. "Yes, children's skin is too sensitive for any of the others", she says.
"SO YOU SAT HERE AND WATCHED ME BARGAIN WITH MY CHILD FOR 10 MINUTES TO GET HER TO PICK THE ONES THAT SHE CAN'T EVEN GET? YOU COULD HAVE SAID SOMETHING OH ABOUT 9 1/2 MINUTES AGO. MAYBE ONE OF THE 17 HOLES IN YOUR HEAD PIERCED YOUR BRAIN OR SOMETHING. OH YEP, RIGHT THERE, I SEE SOME COMMON SENSE DRIPPING OFF OF THAT EYEBROW RING". the pretend strong woman voice in my head screams at her.
"Okay." I lamely reply.
Whatever.


That is the face of bravery huh? She did great and loves being a 'lady' now.

We did some shopping (I swear, I was asked no less than 23 times if I was 'doin' okay' in Aeropostal), I tried to explain to Olivia why that girl in the Victoria's 'not so' Secret window was only in panties. We got some frozen yogurt that I called ice cream (the kids were so not fooled) and decided that the mall is just a flashier, cleaner version of Wal-mart where children actually where shoes. It was time to go and then I spied this little gem out of the corner of my eye.



This guy must be in love.
She talked at him the whole time I followed them around. He never said one word. He would nod now and again in the appropriate places.
What the dirt? She's not carrying any heavy bags or trying on clothes or anything.
Is her shoulder broken?
He's not even carrying it by his side...he's wearing it like a girl.
Maybe it's his.

Here's hoping we all get a little help with the really hard stuff today.

Busted by The Population Police.

So the kids are off-track (joy) and we need something from Costco (curse those Extra Fancy Mixed Nuts). We decide to meet Greg for lunch. Now I hardly ever take all 5 of the kids to any store, let alone Costco for fear of getting the "It's called Birth Control" look from random strangers. My other favorite: "Are they all yours"?.....Really? You think I would bring neighbor kids to Costco?
We had lunch with Greg and the kids were great. I even got a salad instead of a slice of that evil Costco pizza. Whatever.
While shopping we got a few looks and one lady even sighed out loud when she had to wait 3.4 seconds for us to get out of her way.
Now Greg thinks I imagine these looks, sighs, eye-rolls. But it's like I can feel them turn around and look at us as we pass by. And I'm sure he may be right.
But today, it was very real.

After we were done shopping (The kids were almost angelic by the way) we were out in the parking lot. As we got to our rockin' mini-van,
this pulls up next to us.

and then this gets out
and she's carrying this
and wearing theseAnd then this gets out of the back seat.

We're parked next to the shopping cart return so while she is putting her 'tot of perfection' into their cart, I see him point in our direction (most likely at the plethora of kid food) and innocently say, "Mommy, what is that?"

Trendy mom answers "That is someone who has too many children."
Robot Tot says, "Too many children?
Wannabe Paris says, "Yes, more than she can handle".



Oh yes, she did.
You know that filter that we have in the brain? The one that keeps you from saying inappropriate or offensive things? Yeah, I not only got mine but I think
Simon Cowell's and Kathy Griffin's were thrown in too.
I must have gotten this 'ladies' as well because I didn't say anything....
What!?! You didn't say anything Mindy?
I know, I know.
First of all, I was so stunned I didn't know what to say.
I hate confrontation and I don't want anybody's feelings hurt. If my food isn't exactly the way I ordered it, I just keep it and eat it and say "oh well". Most of the time I don't go back if the drivethru girl forgot part of my order. Whatever. I don't know why I do this.

What should I have said? What would you have said?

I couldn't believe she had said it. I mean, I wasn't judging her that she looked like 'Plastic Mom Barbie'. Okay, so I just did but hey, I didn't say it to her in front of her kid.
She can keep her Fendi bag and her bad attitude. And the van may look and smell like a rained out soccer game but at least I don't care if my hair gets wet at said game.
And besides, those shoes wouldn't look good on me anyway.
I should have had the devil pizza.

Self-esteem, your table is ready.

So lately I've been feeling a little blah, blah, bleeh about myself.

My hair is giving me this "you're not the boss of me" attitude and I just can't regain control. Not that I'm not used to this. I get it every single day from Olivia. She recently perfected the "over the shoulder, eye-roll as she's walking away" look.


She's five. No kidding I did not prompt her. I simply asked her to clean her room while I was holding the camera and this is what she did.

Every day is pretty much a really bad hair day. Right around 4 months after I have a baby, my hair decides it no longer wants to be a part of my life and packs it's bags and storms off in a childish huff. It's an ugly break-up for everyone involved. It falls out by the handfuls and it causes me daily stress and anxiety.
But, as bad as I think it is, it is not this nightmare.







On top of that I just can't seem to shake the extra baby poundage. I know, I know...I can hear you saying it. "You've just had your 5th baby, relax, give it a minute, you'll lose it, don't worry." I know all that and it sounds good and all but in the back of my mind there is this annoying little creature running around saying things like "neener, neener..you'll never fit into that fav swim suit again" or the equally depressing, "hello, meet your new best friend, the swimsuit cover-up. You'll never go anywhere without her."




If only that little creature would run around in other people's minds as well.



I've also felt a teeny tiny bit...okay TOTALLY, COMPLETELY disorganized with my time. It's noon or later sometimes when I finally hop in the shower. And don't tell, but sometimes I jump in and *gasp* I don't wash my hair. And then there are days when I simply throw on some clean clothes and spray myself with Fabreeze and then avoid close proximity with anyone who smells like strawberries or coconut.

Still, I am not attracting insects who's sole purpose in life is to eat as much rotting matter as possible before they die.
You can go throw up now.......really...I'll wait.




And then there's the brain damage that has apparently occurred. I find myself having difficulty with the simplest of tasks. And it seems that recently they started introducing Rocket Science to 2nd graders and trying to pass it off as simple math. How dare they. And my memory..don't even get me started on that. Uhm...what were we just talking about? Hmm.
But at least I get to be stupid and forgetful in the privacy of my home in front of small children. This sad lady got to be stupid and do so for a much larger and harsher audience. Poor thing. I wonder how many times Regis asked her if that was her final answer.


For quite a while after I have a baby I feel like I look pretty Frumpy most of the time. I try my best but I just don't feel like the Fashion Diva I would like to be.
But then just when I'm afraid I've hit rock-bottom with the fashion sense and good taste......





Yep ladies. That's just what you think it is.
My question is this. SERIOUSLY???




So even though I'm feeling a little like a slug at the moment, at least I can be grateful there's not a snot-nosed 7 year old boy standing over me with a giant salt shaker.

Hope you feel good today.
Here's to common sense and good taste.